"Dear Busty BriAnna..." The Best of My Fan Mail

Archive 9

______________________________

~ Letters Dept. Pt.1 ~

Q* "Dear Busty BriAnna,
            Do magazines give anything to the people who get their letters published
       on the 'Dear Editor' page?"

A* Yes. Valuable space!

.....

Q* "Dear Busty,
            Please tell me just HOW random are the letters that get printed in your
      'Best of Fan Mail' archives?"

A* About as random as anything aimed at a wastepaper basket! The ones that
      MISS get printed!   :-)

~ Crude Dept. Pt.1 ~

Q* "Dear BriAnna,
            Since I am not familiar with fan clubs, send me a sample photo and maybe
       I'll join!"

A* ...And then you WOKE UP!

....

Q* "Dear Busty BriAnna,
            I have a serious question - so please, all kidding aside!...
       You say in your website that you love animals. So have you ever let one of 
        your pets lick your pussy? I know most people won't admit this... 
           Awaiting your response..."

A* Mister, you've definitely got the WRONG WEBSITE! I think you're looking
      for sex4sickos, and when you're you're done with them check out
     psychologicalhelp.com!

......

Q* "Dear Busty,
            I WANT TO FUCK YOU!"

A* I was WONDERING when a class act like yourself was going to write me!

~ Future Veterinarian Dept. Pt.1~

Q* "Dear Busty B.,
            Will you still dance once you become a vet?"

A* Let's think about this for a minute... a DVM degree takes an average of
      eight years to earn. Now, after devoting those 8+ years of my life to studying
      anatomy, physiology, research technology, laboratory techniques, medical &
     surgical nursing, radiography techniques, exotic animal medicine,
      farm animal nursing, microbiology, chemistry, physics, metric system dosage
      calculations, anesthesiology, transgenics, animal behavior, pharmacology,
      etc... Plus devoting months of internships at small animal practices, zoos,
      animal hospitals, etc... Plus spending six digits for this education, I'm just 
      going to hang my diploma on my dressing room door while I go strut on
      stage??????????????????????????????????
                               Please ask your doctor to lower the dosage!

.....

Q* "Dear Busty BriAnna,
            I just wanted to tell you that I think you are sensationally beautiful... I'll
       bring my cat to see you if she ever gets sick. In fact... I think I'll bring her 
       regardless... you know... just to make sure she's OK... you can never be too 
       careful!"

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